Okay, so what would I change? Hmm. That's a hard question...
LOTS OF STUFF.
Sometimes life just gets pretty rough, and honestly, the best way to stop that is to change things.
If I could change one thing I would change this: I would be more outgoing.
Yes, that's kind of a general term, "outgoing", but let me get specific. To me, outgoing would mean standing up for myself and making myself noticed. I would have liked to start off happy with myself and ready to be myself! It's not that i'm completely not outgoing--I am when i'm comfortable and I don't feel like i'm surrounded by a lot of people with pre-determined judgments about me. I think that's really what it is. Some people aren't bothered by what others think about them. Some people don't care at all! They just know who they are and be who they want to be, regardless of what others say or think. That's an admirable trait. I don't have it. Well, I kind of don't have it. I used to be really meek and i used to really care about what people thought about me (I still do, a little, but so does everyone--at least a little bit!). Now i'm a little different because over the course of my junior year I kind of "discovered" myself. I decided who I was, what I wanted to be, and who I wanted to be. You know "found myself" as some people say. It was painful, and hard, and it was a very rough year for me, but it was also one of the greatest. It was so, so important to my future (and my sanity) and I'll never regret it. I just wish that i would have been more outgoing from the start. If i was outgoing, it wouldn't have been as hard for me as it was. I would have probably made a smoother transition that wouldn't have resulted in what it originally did. Being outgoing would be a nice change. Being blissfully unaware of judgement would be amazing. Well, you'd be aware, you just WOULDN'T CARE! So that is what i would change. I would make myself more outgoing!
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